Sales

Today I went shopping for makeup and skin care products, something I have almost never done. I ended up in Sephora where I tried all kinds of fun things. I was interested in buying some makeup and/or skincare but didn't find anything spectacular so I left without making a purchase.

I tried on glasses in another store and took a pic to remember them. I was trying to be incognito... hence the bad picture. Regardless, you can see the results of playing at Sephora:-).

On my way out of the mall, a man from one of the kiosks pulled me to a booth where a young woman washed my hands with a salt scrub. It was nice, but I clearly wasn't interested. She used our initial interaction to segway into a conversation about her other products.

She brilliantly asked me questions like, "are you more interested in taking care of the skin on your body or your face," and, "are you more drawn to a product for your whole face or your eyes." Difficult to say "no" to those types of questions.

I ended up purchasing a toner product. As I was checking out I mentioned to the sales girl that she caught me on a good day because I was looking for something along those lines. I didn't mean I wanted more, just that it was cool that I found a good product along the lines of what I came for. She got the point.

Even so, even though I had already signed for my purchase, she whipped out an eye cream and serum and had them on my face before I knew it. It was really nice stuff, taking away my eye puffiness visibly and instantly. I had a feeling it would be expensive, but the price was about ten times more than I would have dreamed of spending on something like that.

She asked enough questions to understand that, although I liked it, there was no way I could afford it. She asked another question, "do you care more about crows feet or bags under your eyes," which I wasn't sure how to answer (neither sound good). She looked hard at my face and decided the cream could suffice. Then she brought the price down. I asked for her card in case someone wanted to get it for me for a gift. She brought the price down more. I said I'd call my husband and talk to him about it, which I did. Ultimately, Kagi surprised me by telling me to purchase it, which was very unexpected and generous of him.

It stood out to me what a great salesperson that girl was. I'm a very tough sell. I hate feeling pushed into buying things. I'm also great at getting out of a situation when I feel pressure to do something I'm not sure about. I like thinking through my purchases, and feel confident that I can find what I want when I want it.

This girl did catch me on a good day with a good product. But it was more than that. She helped me see that this product was what I wanted. Then she read me well enough to offer a price I could be happy about, even if it was much more expensive than I imagined I would spend.

I am really fascinated by the way good sales works. It was a major part of my occupation for several years, and during that time I gained a huge appreciation for the art of selling and admiration for those who can do it well. I think it's like playing a sport -- anyone can do it to some level, but it takes talent, practice, and confidence to really do it well.

The things that particularly stood out from this interaction was that, although she clearly had an objective, she worked to understand where I was coming from. I legitimately felt like she was working with me. She didn't seem stressed or afraid of me walking away. She was driving forward, but not pushy. She had time for me, but wasn't going to waste my time.

Ultimately, she left me very confident about the wisdom of my purchase. I'm convinced I got something great which answers a need. I feel pampered and look forward to using this product. I also feel like we both got a good deal, which is perfect!

Blast From The Past

Today I had the opportunity to be a "community judge" at a speech and debate tournament. It was very fun in and of itself, and it was also a blast from a mostly forgotten part of my past.

I was a debater for one year in high school. In fact, I think I lettered in it (gives some insight into the kind of high schooler I was:-)). Truth be told, I don't think I was very good. I participated in cross examination (CX) debate, which means I had a partner. My partner was Tabi and she was (and I assume still is) brilliant. Seriously seriously smart girl. Because of her, we made it to the state championship our sophomore year.

During the last few months I have had a few reminders of the past. First of all, we cleaned my parents' basement over Christmastime. That brought back lots of memories. Old clothes, notes from school and notes from friends, and etc.

Beyond that, it's 2013, which means it has been 10 YEARS since I graduated from high school in 2003! This is crazy. It has been fun to hear from the other officers from my class and be privy to conversations about how to plan a reunion. That group and I planned many many events back in the day, and although this time it's over facebook and I'm not really involved (since I'm not in Colorado) it is really fun to hear from them. And it brings back lots of fond memories!

This is Deb, my mentor, with me sometime during high school.

Packing... again

10:30am

Well, it's that time again. Packing. Ugg, I'm not thrilled about this! You can tell because I'm writing about it before doing it... a sure procrastination technique! The goal, though, is to do it today, which for me is pretty good. It's 5 days before I travel. If I can get it done today I'll be in good shape.

One of the benefits of an international life is that you learn that there are some things best purchased in certain locations. For example, it is best to buy tea, chocolate, cheese, and vegetables in England. For me, it is better to buy clothes, cake mix, electronics, and almost everything else in the States. Things are cheaper and I know how to work the sales better. This is not the kind of packing I mentioned in my Packing Light blog. This is the "get as much as you can to where it's useful" kind of packing. Totally different.

I'm going to be in the UK for about 4 months before returning for Jenni's wedding. Since Kagi and I are planning to be in the UK for at least another year and a half, I am working to get as much of what I already have over there. This summer we will take many of ourwedding gifts and household items which are now waiting in Maryland.

Now, I need to take things like sheets I bought with wedding money which we really need in England. At the moment, we're using a makeshift set of a fitted sheet from Ikea and and twin top sheet for our almost queen sized bed (it's an Ikea bed which is between sizes). I found two wonderful sets which I'm very excited about (wow, what does it mean when sheets excite you?). Kagi and I also received a sweet denim blanket from my mom for Christmas. I love it, but denim is heavy. I'm not sure how to fit it.

So, I'm going to get to work. I'll update you with progress throughout the day.

12:30

Laundry done, everything I want to take out of the closet and drawers. This is not a pretty sight but it's a necessary first step.

 3:30

After lunch I carefully folded and organized everything in their categories. When I pack I like to see everything before putting it into bags

8:00pm

After dinner I got back to work and finished packing it all up. The pile on the left is the pile of things I realized weren't going to fit. I'm disappointed about my amazing denim quilt, but I'm hoping someone can bring it with them on a visit to England before too long:-). As you can see, the suitcase is pretty ridiculously full. It is 49 pounds, 1 under the limit. The carry-on is pretty light and has a little room in it, just in case there are any problems with the weight of my checked bag at the airport.

 8:30

I admit that I really fought to get the big suitcase closed but here we have it! With room to spare in my carry-ons.

So here we go, I'm packed earlier than ever before. That's cool... but I have been realizing I have a big problem.

I don't know how to get ready for bed, because my toiletries are in that suitcase! Worse, I'm supposed to be somewhere in the morning, and my clothes, makeup, and etc are all packed! I really don't want to open that big bag. Seriously, it took me like 15 minutes of sitting on it, turning it upside down, and pulling with all of my strength to get it closed. There is a little fear that I won't be able to get it all back in there.

I am going to see what I can find around the house. Maybe I don't need to open it.

Nope, scratch that... my toothbrush is in there.

This is why this is probably why I never pack early, and why this is unlikely to ever become an advice blog. Haha!

Argo

Tonight, Pops and I watched Argo. I have been wanting to see it for a while, but didn't know much about the story prior to watching it. Here is the trailer in case you don't know the premise:

I can see why Argo won so many awards this year. It was so well done, with both humor and hardship which effectively made me feel like I was there, experiencing the trauma of being stuck in a country where you are considered the enemy.

It was real enough that I am actually still a little stressed!

I have had a few traumatic experiences at borders and it brought them to the front of my mind. I remember how every time I went out of Israel I was considered a security risk because I lived in Bethlehem. I was strip-searched a few times and regularly had my bags meticulously searched.

More recently, I was questioned and held in Glasgow for five hours before my request for a tourist visa was ultimately rejected. They were kind and courteous to me, but it was one of the most stressful situations I have ever been in. Leaving the country the airline staff considered me a "deportee," although that was not the case.  I couldn't decide if it was funny or embarrassing. I guess it was both.

In the two trips into the UK after that, I needed to wait while all of my documents were examined and am now all too aware that a sovereign state can accept or reject visitors at will. Thankfully those trips didn't involve too much questioning.

I know more about borders than I would like to. They are stressful for everyone, and even as a civilian sometimes you feel like you are supposed to be sneaky to get through. I have realized that honesty is the best policy and I no longer try to out-smart anyone. It's important to remember that there is not much need to get stressed when you're not hiding anything. Transparency is already a life policy of mine but it is helpful to remember its benefits of it when traveling. Thankfully I haven't had an Argo experience. Hopefully it'll stay that way!

I am so thankful that I have my visa sorted out before traveling this time.

Just six days until I leave for England:-). I took this pic in London about a year ago.

Yipeeeee!

Today I was totally and marvelously surprised!

I told friends this past weekend that I was fairly confident that it would be three weeks minimum before I go back to England. I finally have been resigning myself to the circumstances I'm in, beginning to make some plans in the States.

While I was waking up I glanced through my email on my iPhone. I saw an email from the visa agency and opened it before even thinking about its potential significance. Maybe my visa was finally assigned to an officer, which would be great.

When I read the words, "Your visa has been issued," I was completely flabbergasted. I wish I could replay my facial expressions. Actually, I probably looked something like this girl... except in my case the confusion turned into delight instead of horror:

Much of today was spent looking at airline tickets and buying some for next week. I'll make sure that they are still the best deal tomorrow -- plane ticket prices change on a day by day (or sometimes hour by hour) basis.

I am thrilled that I get to go back to be with my husband. I'm also thrilled that I'll have a visa which will give official status in the UK -- I will be able to leave and return without concern about borders, can get a supplemental job, and etc.

I am thankful that God has sustained us these crazy six months. And I am really happy that from here on out, Kagi and I should be able to be physically together even as we make decisions on where to live and apply for visas together. God willing...

Thank you all for your prayers and for the myriad of ways you have helped and encouraged us through a difficult time. I honestly didn't know when it would end, and today seems to be that day. Praise God.

So excited to get back to this man!

Unnatural Grace

Today I was thinking about grace. Grace sounds so nice. It brings images to mind like a graceful flower or a swan. Beautiful, peaceful, gentle, natural.

In the dictionary, I found some interesting definitions here. Grace is a deep word. I've heard it defined as unmerited favor. The word can be what a king does when he visits a peasant. It can mean approval, favor, mercy, or pardon. It can mean "sense of propriety or right," which seems to contradict some of the other definitions. Our Sunday school teacher in Spokane keeps saying that grace is scandelous. It doesn't seem right. It's unnatural.

In my observation, grace is hard. It's costly and active. It demands tremendous self-sacrifice to bestow unmerited favor. It's unfair.

This got me thinking about my experience with grace, especially as it relates to conflict. When my siblings and I were kids, we were great at getting underneath one another's skin. Allison and I are the closest in age, and had the most run-ins. She was always a lot cooler than me and although 13 months younger she was always socially a step ahead. I remember several instances when it went like this:

She did something that hurt my feelings.

I could have chosen, at this point, to respond with grace.

However, I responded naturally, and got angry. Acting on that anger, my fists started flying. I was always a lot bigger and was also a good fighter, so the physical odds were decidedly in my favor.

The circumstances, however, were not. The one who gets in trouble when a fight starts is almost always the big one who is punching, no matter what the little one did to deserve it.

I have a vague memory of my mom making me apologize while I was still seeing red. Imagine her holding me back so I couldn't continue the physical onslaught.

Mom: "Laura, apologize to your sister."

Laura (spitting the words): "I'm sorry."

Allison: "Mom, she didn't mean it!"

Mom: "Laura, you know how we do this in our family. Look her in the EYES, say you're sorry, and ask her to forgive you."

OH the pain of that moment! Trying to make myself apologize was swimming against the current of every emotion in me. Sure, I knew I shouldn't have been beating my sister up. But from my perspective, she totally deserved it! I had reacted in the only way I knew I could win. In my eyes, I was justified.

If I apologize, doesn't she get off scot-free for what she did to me? Worse, to ask for forgiveness was to ask her to be gracious to me. Maybe she would see that as weakness and use it against me. Still, I knew I wasn't going to get out of the situation until I did an unnatural thing: apologize.

Breathe. Stop looking at your feet. Just get it over with.

Laura (pushing out the words while trying to make eye contact with her smug opponent): "I'm sorry. (Long pause, breathe, breathe, breathe.) Will you forgive me?"

Mom: "Allison, tell her you forgive her."

Allison (reluctantly, and looking a little less smug): "I forgive you."

Although somewhat forced, she did grant me favor with those words.

In that feeling of swimming upstream against my emotions, I was learning some big lessons. I felt I had the right to make her pay. She hurt me, and how else could I convey how hurt I was other than to show her what hurt feels like? Still, I wasn't right to make her pay. In hindsight  here is no way I could have punished her fairly. You may think that my reaction was disproportionate to her crime. But it certainly wasn't to me!

The Bible has a lot of unnatural commands regarding dealing with conflict. This one comes to mind today:

Romans 12:17-21
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”says the Lord. On the contrary:

          “If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
          if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
          In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Allison is far from evil and neither is she my enemy. But what if I had in mind that I would fight with kindness, giving her grace when she offended me? It would have been a lot less painful for me, for starters. I should have done that unnatural thing then, and I should do it more often now.

Present

Although there are a few things I think I could write about today, I don't seem able to do any of them justice. So, I decided to share one of my favorite Bible verses which has come up in conversation a few times lately.  This verse is a beautiful reminder of some very deep truths.